My baby almost died

She is only thirteen this baby. I gave birth to her and welcomed her into my life as she was soooo loved and expected. A little angel was born that day, and I fell in love. Since then, we spend almost everyday together. She grew into such a beautiful young lady. She is calm, and funny, and has close friends. She can be so very nice, and sometimes so coniving to her sisters. She takes good care of them. She loves horses but only has a puppy. She is an artist, she can draw really well and she sings like an angel. She has a real ear for music and learns instruments very easily.
And… she almost died.
She is pale. always so pale, but being a redhead, even more so. She has been complainng about stomach cramps. Of course, first train of thought, of course she is at that age when you fall in womanhood, it is normal to get cramps. She got them often, but then again, at what age do you become regular? when do the cramps settle?
But then, on that thursday, she became nauseous. In the evening, she threw up everuthing she had managed to eat that day. And more. We figured that she had a gastro. So we cleaned and disinfected. Got her sisters and the dog to stay away, made some fort out of her room so the herms wouldn’T travel. Then friday and saturday comes, still no sign of imminent health. She was still throwing up, but had nothing left to throw up. Her explusion was much more than her intake.
I saw it, it wasn’T bile, nor food, it was clearly puss. She was not sleeping anymore. She was in too much pain.
On sunday morning, I brought her to the emergency room. They checked her out and sent her home saying that the gastros were tough this year, she had just gotten it bad, but it would go away soon.
So we went home and she continued emptying herself in our toilet/bowls. Poor baby! She threw up what seemed like puss all day and her breath started smelling like poo. Real poo. We got real scared and went back to the emergency room. This time, with some insistence, they really checked her out. She spent the night in a bed where she continued to throw up, but was hooked on IV for rehydration. In the morning, she went to get an ultrasound. That is where they saw it, her appendix had burst.
My baby’s appendix had burst and was slowly poisoning her body. And she was expulsing puss and smelled like poopoo because some of it had escaped into her body.
They put her on a 2nd degree emegency surgery list. She was supposed to go into surgery in 30 minutes, but ended up going on monday night at 1 am.
She was so nervous, and sick. She was not allowed to drink because she was going to be tubed in and be put to sleep.
A few hours later, I was able to go to the wake-up room to check on her. She was so feeble, so drugged, so skinny and weak. So much pain in her eyes. All those machines hooked up to her. Something no mother ever wants to see.
We got a room in the hospital for her. A four-patient room. She had three room mates with her. And they were loud. Again, Kayla was unable to sleep and rest after being sick for so many days and having surgery. Nurses kept looking in on her, goving her morphone, gravol, and antibiotics. I moved into the room too. Staying awake beside her for so long. I couldn’T sleep and totally underate for the week. She stayed there until sunday. She was a wek in the hospital. So close to dying. I cried so much. She was depressed, she was grumpy and fussy. Drugged and delirious. She was rough on her family and all the nurses.
But I never was so scared in my life. I never was so scared to lose someone I loved. She is home now. Her fever dropped. She is now on oral antibiotics, pain meds, and tylenol. She is being a pro about this. She is taking her meds and is getting better every day. She walks and talks, she has pain but got out of her funk. The best thing that happened to her was to go home after all those days. I wasn’T recognising her anymore over there in the hospital. But now she is back to normal. SHe is making music, singing, playing with her computer, playing Wii, and started eating again.
My baby is back! And I am so thankful. It came too close. Thank goodness we put pressure, thank goodness we went back, because at the rate she was poisonning herself, she would have been dead a long time ago, and I would have lost my baby.
It was a really hard week. The kind of week I wouldnt want for anybody. The kind of week that makes you put things in perspective knowing that the small things in life are exactly that: small, and that we should only care about the important things, love, family, health.


literature vs redheadrox

I am a big reader. In fact, I am a speed reader and I have a wide variety of interests. I can sometimes read from two to three books in a week. The fact is, I don’t really sleep much, and it keeps me occupied while I wait for the sandman to finally make an appearance in my humble home.
I have been an even worst sleeper lately… but the problem is, my mind is already going a million miles an hour and so I can’t even concentrate on my books, nor can I continue my paintings.
Nonetheless, a few days ago, I managed to finish a wonderful novel by a quebec writer called ‘Sophie Bérubé’. She wrote ‘Sans Antécédents’ Throughout the whole novel, I kept thinking, holy shit, this writer knows me and my past. She has found out my past and is writing it to the world.
The main character’s name is Roxanne, she had a very fucked up relationship with a narcisistic prickwho ends up trying to destroy her by trying to make everyone think she is crazy while all the time, he is fucking with her mind.
During the reading of this novel I wnt through all the emotions possible… from anger, to wonder, to sadness to happiness.
And that is what it’s all about. That is why I read. It keeps me full of emotions about things that are not personal so that I can concentrate on the non-emotional things in my real life.
I think it took me three days to come down from my high from reading this book. I almost had to go to therapy to deal with the grief of this novel being finished. And since then,… nothing. Not one book. I can’T read a single book. I don’t think it is because none match it, but I think it is because I don’T feel like going through all the emotions.
But now that means I am not reading… which makes it real hard to fall asleep… don’t you think? `
Every night I am sleepless in Montreal, and basically, just listening to hubby dear snore for a while before I can give into the night and finally fall asleep.
On this note, Let me get back to listening to him lull me to sleep with a snoring song.. The song that reminds me how lucky I am to have him by my side every night of my life.

What a wonderful life!

It is smoldering hot outside. I am loving this weather! Beats shoveling the car out of the snow!

I am at peace with life these days. Seems like nothing could penetrate this hapiness to ruin it. 

Work is going great as usual! I am still working at my favorite daycare, earning a good living taking care of wonderful boys whom I adore. 

At home, my kids are getting older and more and more beautiful. I feel so lucky to have created such wonderful daughters. 

My eldest is thriving in school. She is doing wonderfully in all her classes and doing so well in cadets too, she’s already a corporal. She also sings wonderfully! 

My middle child is so bright, everyone who meets her is charmed by her. She is so quick to make friends and is growing so fast! She was adopted by my husband and she is so happy! Thy have such a wonderful and unique relationship! they are a great team. A natural team. 

My youngest is talking more qnd more. She reminds me of my two other children when they were her age. She is silly and naughty and very smart. I can’T believe I am so lucky to have her. 

Hubby dearest is my savior. Just when I had lost hope that there were decent men out there, He came into my life and showed me what a good relationship is all about. He constantly shows me how much he loves me and makes me happy. 

I am singing in my choir and absolutely adoring it. The women in this choir are so nice and happy. We are singing so many songs too! I am carrying a binder with all the sheet music we sing with and it weighs a ton. We have sweet adelines competitions in May and I would really like to kick ass!

I am having lots of fun with all my friends this summer. Nothing better than a glass of vino tinto on the balcony with some friends, just messing around and having a good time. I love that summer allows people to go outside and be social! I am doing a nice garden with my neighbors and it is actually growing nicely! The fruit of our work is coming. 

I think that being in love, having a great family, and a beautiful home is totally helping me love life. 

So, dearest friends and followers, have a great summer! I wish you to be happy. Blessed be!

Happiness within..

Forgive me father for I have sinned, it has been forever since my last blog!

I got lost in my life. Couldn’t find my way back to my WordPress page, but I seem cured today. So here goes;

It is in the middle of January already. I am always, always, always busy. I work full time and come home late. I have three wonderful children at home waiting for me when I am done work. I have my hubby who is always there for me. I have meetings for my work, and Administration council meeting. My daughters go to scouts, cadets, doctors, eye doctors, Clsc, hospital, sleepovers, camp, horseback riding, and I am now not only a mom, but a professional planner for all these activities. Of course I double book sometimes, and I run from one place to the other because I always seem to forget that there is always travel time between activities. I still paint. More and more I should say. I even have special requests that I am working on, and my own personal special collection of freaky paintings I want for my house. Between al this, I still find the time to paint my nails every second day and watch some series on the telly.

I am not saying I am superwoman…. but no one has ever really seen me in the same room and the same time as superwoman… so that is enough to leave a doubt in your mind.

But while I am living this busy life, I forget to say how much I enjoy it though. Married life suits me. I am totally loving this whole relationship. My husband is going to HEC Montréal to get a diploma in business management, and I also decided to do something for myself. (Career wise I am good, and don’t really want to change anything). So I took up Choir. OH my goodness. I was so happy when I came back from my last practice. I absolutely fell in love with the choir ladies. We are singing some songs for a contest next month. And We are choosing Beatles songs!! I love it. No more church choirs for me. (Technically we practice in a church basement, but they are not related). So I am taking every Monday nights off to myself. Wow!

As a new year resolution this year, I decided to take care of my health. I am already seeing doctors, I found a doctor that will follow me, I have reduced all my medication, will be losing weight, changed the family’s diet, no more munchies at night (except for sunflower seeds which don’t make you gain weight) and no wine except for occasions. (And that goes for all alcohol too… From Laura Secord chocolate alcohol to Porto)…

I also decided to get involved in stuff… hence the Choir… and also I will continue hosting parties at my home… did I mention I have a really nice home… I have a big 9 1/2 home. Everyone has their own room and we have a big laundry room and work room. I love it! I don’t ever want to move from here. Unless it is to buy my own house… which I am not ready to do yet in my life.

Anyways, I must say, life is treating me kindly. Everything is where it is supposed to be. All the negative is finally out and all that is left is happiness and love. I keep my distance from energy vampires and stay close to people who are positive. I cleaned out my social network and my home. I love it.

Anyways, life awaits, gotta take care of my baby.

I will surely write soon. Well at least sooner than the gap from my last blog.



Lover’s vacation 2013

Alrighty, it has been a very long time since I wrote a blog. Or anything for that matter. But I am sincerely ecstatic to tell y’all that I am leaving for the states in a few days!!  yes yes. I am going on a beautiful trip with my husband.  

We are going to visit six different cities, stating with Lost river, Orleans, Provincetown, Boston, Malden, Salem.

I have been to these cities before, but now, I am embarking on a seriously enticing wonderful trip with my husband… without our three kids.

A kid-less trip. oh ya!!!!!

Plus, my husband is completely able with directions, so I feel safe knowing he will get us there and he loves driving, and we get along so much! I think this trip will be refreshing.

I will re-blog with info and pictures!  


Oh my goodness!

I only have two more weeks at this daycare, and then I start my other daycare work. I am so excited!

I know that I will have a single class, with eight children only. The noise level will go down considerably. I get to do the activities that I chose with my children when I want to do them without asking the other classes to no interrupt or their ideas. I get to overplan everyday, just because I feel like it. I get to have circle time all alone, singing without everyone  listening all the time. I get to clean my class a certain way, and have it stay clean.

Two more weeks here. I love the children here, and I love working with my two co-workers… but I really can’t wait to get out of here.

I think it is like that for everyone, when you know that you will be leaving, you can’t wait to do it and you just want to change that page right away.


I had several interviews for a new job. Basically I had to turn a few down on the basis of their structure, their interview skills, distance,.  And I got two job offers which I said yes to.

The first one was at a CPE. The interview itself was dynamic and creative. The staff there was so very nice and welcoming. It started with a group interview where they asked us to choose topics out of a bowl and discuss them. They asked us to choose some toys from the class and say why it appealed to us or not. We were three doing the interview at the same time. I loved every minute of it. I like seeing who we are up against. I am competitive by nature and like to take charge, so I owned that job from the get-go.

They called me for my second interview two days later and got the job right away.

The second job I said yes to starts in August. I would be general director in a private daycare. I would have to answer to the owners only. I did not like the interview nor did I like the women interviewing me. BUT, it is better pay and a promotion… or should I say, a different job function completely.

However, I told them to call me back in August to see if I am enjoying myself in this CPE and if I don’t really mind leaving, I will go with them… but I honestly think that I will keep being an educator. I like working with children much more than if I was working with adults. If children misbehave, its normal… if educators misbehave, its retarded and subordinate.

I would much rather teach children now than discipline adults later.

So there. Starting work in two weeks, Lee-Lee is changing daycare too. On with the new and exciting life! 

Now if only my hubby could find a better job!! he would be as excited and happy as me!

OK, logging off now. Have a great day sweet readers!





It felt good to vent in my last blog, and I thank you all for the private messages that you sent me encouraging me and relating to me.

Often, when I get too emotional, I really need to explode on paper/computer rather than exploding in real life. I lets me download my issues online rather than do it to a person in particular, and then say things all wrong.

It gives me the chance to write all my thought in any way, and then I can focus on the things that are most important and discuss them in an organised fashion.

I thank you so much, blog followers and visitors, and I know I can sound super scary when I unleash all my anger in a blog, but in reality, I am a rather calm person.

I have to be for the job I do. I am very patient with the children I work with. I often am jovial and love to make people laugh.

I like organisation and when things are clear. And when they aren’t, I clarify them and organise them myself. I don’t usually give up and go.

Anyways, I gotta go back to work soon, but again, thank you for reading me regularly, your support is well appreciated!